I got choked up this morning listening to the song “Show You The Way To Go,” by The Jacksons. There’s something about these old songs from my childhood (especially Michael Jackson’s) that touches me deeply. I guess the time I spent with a childhood friend last weekend is responsible for me being in this state of heightened awareness. She opened up to me revealing many things about her childhood and her current emotional state that, in turn, opened me up. It seems that I can feel again, which is something I welcome. I hadn’t realized how much I’ve cut myself off from people… from feeling… from expressing. I’ve justified it by saying that I don’t want to spread my negative energy. For the most part I love being alone with my thoughts. However, I do realize that too much isolation can be dangerous. Human interaction is as important as breathing, so we must make an effort to connect. Not just with anyone either. I think if we listen close enough our spirit will whisper whether or not to connect with someone. I’m so happy I decided to listen to mine that day when I reached out to her on Facebook.
The only person that I connect with on a deep level is my oldest sister. When in pain I simply retreat to my inner world and deal with it alone or chat with her about whatever is dancing around in my head. Like most people I tend to suppress extreme emotions for the sake of coping. It may just be that the key to healing is feeling. We must welcome our suffering (perhaps we should stop referring to it as suffering). It’s simply a temporary condition of the mind, right? I’ve written many times on this blog that if we want growth and maturity we must feel our pain… sit in it… and at times share it with someone we trust. I am so honored that she decided to share her pain with me. I will cherish our friendship and I can’t wait to communicate with her on deeper level.